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By the 1970s, the American woman was being called 'liberated' or 'superwoman' while the American man was being called 'baby killer' if he fought in Vietnam, 'traitor' if he protested, or 'apathetic' if he did neither. Even men who came home paraplegics were literally spit on.
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Every day, almost as many men are killed at work as were killed during the average day in Vietnam. For men, there are, in essence, three male-only drafts: the draft of men to all the wars; the draft of Everyman to unpaid bodyguard; the draft of men to all the hazardous jobs—or 'death professions.'
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A study of attorneys found that the attorneys whose pictures were judged independently to be the better-looking ones were able to earn about 12% more per year than the less good-looking ones. The better-looking attorneys worked longer hours, but even when that and dozens of other variables were controlled for, the better-looking attorneys were able to bill significantly more per hour. Needless to say, the male attorneys were ranked as much less attractive than the women, increasing the gap in women's pay over men's. The bigger the gap in looks, the bigger was the gap in pay. The more time passed, the more the gap widened. Sometimes life isn't fair.
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The first instinctive response to any criticism is a defensive response. (The quicker the response, the more defensive.)
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Unemployment, of course, sends the economy into a recession, creating more unemployment. Ironically, unemployment hurts women more than men. Feminists argue that's because of sex discrimination: women are the last to be hired and the first to be fired. Correct on the outcome; wrong on the reason. We hire first what we need most, and we fire first what we need least. That's why you hire the garbage collector first, and fire him last. Men may be hired first and fired last because more men are willing to do society's dirty work and hazardous work for a lower price.
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As long as society tells men to be the salespersons of sex, it is sexist for society to put only men in jail if they sell well. We don't put other salespersons in jail for buying clients drinks and successfully transforming a no into a maybe into a yes. If the client makes a choice to drink too much and the yes turns out to be a bad decision, it is the client who gets fired, not the salesperson.
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Dads in the family are even more important than women in the workplace: The workplace benefits from women, but the family needs dads.
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If organized team sports develop managerial skills for a corporate setting, pickup team sports are more like training to be an entrepreneur... Pickup team sports are still about 99% male. That is, this form of preparation to be an entrepreneur is about 99% male socialization. I believe this is one of many contributors to why men who run their own business earn twice what their female counterparts earn.
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I define power as control over one's life. Pay is not about power. Pay is about giving up power to get the power of pay.
Warren Farrell
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Male Message 1 is subconsciously experienced by the boy like this: 'Some girls in my class already look like movie stars. If they wanted me as much as I want them, then I'd know I was okay. They are genetic celebrities. I am a genetic groupie.'
Warren Farrell
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Your daughter says, 'Dad. Mom. I want to join the armed services.' You look at her beautiful face, her life flashes before your eyes, and you see a body bag. Now's the time to let her know the biggest military secret: She can join the military and be as safe-from-death as she would be at home. How? In the war in Iraq, not a single woman has been killed in the Air Force. Nor has a single woman been killed in the Marines. And only one has died in the Navy. Your only job is to keep her out of the Army.
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Circumcision in the United States is routinely performed without anesthesia, though anesthesia reduces the infant's stress and prevents infection and blood clots.
Warren Farrell
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Sitcoms routinely portray women hitting men, almost never portray men hitting women. When he fails to leave, it is not called Battered Man Syndrome ; it is called comedy.
Warren Farrell
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Today, violence against women is rightly abhorred. But we call violence against men entertainment. Think of football, boxing, wrestling... All are games used to sugarcoat violence against men, originally in need of sugarcoating so our team —or our society —could bribe its best protectors to sacrifice themselves.
Warren Farrell
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The function of gossip is to create an in group bond by creating an out group enemy.
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The 'enduring theme' [in fiction] of male competition and female competition for the hero/survivor has taken us from the fittest surviving to the brink of no one surviving. Sex roles have gone from functional to dysfunctional almost overnight. This is why the enduring theme must be questioned now.
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Laws are made with such attention to protecting women that, if a man's constitutional rights conflict with a woman's protection, his rights disintegrate before her protection disintegrates.
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When our binoculars are focused on the dad as deadbeat, it often even leads us to missing concrete cues a dad gives to show his desire to be involved.
Warren Farrell
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The less our sons our trusted, the less women are able to really love them, and the more women feel entitled to use them as wallets.
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Survey 2001: Men who never married, never had a child, worked full time and were college educated earn only 85% of what women with the same criteria earn.
Warren Farrell
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Minimizing the role of sexual attraction in rape denies our responsibility for reinforcing men's addiction to female sexual beauty and then depriving men of what we've helped addict them to.
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We often think that when a man insults another man by calling him a girl, the insult reflects a contempt for women. No. It reflects a contempt for any man who is unwilling to make himself strong enough to protect someone as precious as a woman.
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If we want our children to have a balance between their abilities to earn money and show love, it will help if both their parents model that balance. – page 114.
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When women entered the workplace, many men were mentors to them and, in turn, also learned to respect women's unique contributions (for example, their listening and facilitative skills). Now, as we give men responsibilities to care for children, women must be among the mentors, and we must also learn to respect men's unique contributions.
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The more a man is trained to be a man, the more he is trained to protect women and children, not hurt women and children. He is trained to volunteer to die before even a stranger is hurt – especially a woman or child.
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Women's scars and rituals involved beauty (piercing ears and noses, binding feet, and wearing corsets); men's involved protecting women. In cultures in which physical strength is still the best way to protect women, as among the Dodos in Uganda, each time a man kills a man, he is awarded a ritual scar; the more scars, the more he is considered eligible.
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We often hear that mothers do the caring; fathers just do the playing. This is a false dichotomy — even a dangerous one — because fathers' particular style of play involves both a conscious focus on teaching and, as the research is now showing, is instructive to children even when it is not consciously designed to be so.
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Test this out on yourself. Imagine that for a month you have neither had your garbage picked up nor an opportunity to read about new anthropological discoveries. Which would you pay more money to remedy? A society that functions effectively adjusts the pay until the supply matches the need. Failure to make these adjustments not only leaves streets filled with garbage, but also leaves unemployment lines filled with anthropologists.
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The Female Western is the battle between the good and evil methods of getting the men who perform best.
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Perhaps the biggest appreciation adjustment we need is toward the millions of men and women we call stepparents. We have taken for granted especially the stepparents who are raising no children of their own, and receiving no income from a significant other, but who have nevertheless chosen to invest love, time and money in children.
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Quote of the day
Every word she writes is a lie, including 'and' and 'the'.
Mary McCarthy
Warren Farrell
Creative Commons
Born:
June 26, 1943
(age 81)
Bio:
Warren Thomas Farrell is an American educator, activist and author of seven books on men's and women's issues.
Known for:
The Myth of Male Power (1993)
Why Men Are the Way They Are (1986)
Women Can't Hear What Men Don't Say (1998)
Most used words:
men
women
woman
children
male
love
power
money
child
work
time
pay
sexual
female
family
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