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P. G. Wodehouse Quotes
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Oh, Jeeves,' I said; 'about that check suit.' Yes, sir?' Is it really a frost?' A trifle too bizarre, sir, in my opinion.' But lots of fellows have asked me who my tailor is.' Doubtless in order to avoid him, sir.' He's supposed to be one of the best men in London.' I am saying nothing against his moral character, sir.
P. G. Wodehouse
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Work, the what's-its-name of the thingummy and the thing-um-a-bob of the what d'you-call-it.
P. G. Wodehouse
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His whole aspect was that of a man who has unexpectedly been struck by lightning.
P. G. Wodehouse
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For the first time since sudden love had thrown them into each other's arms, she had found herself beginning to wonder if her Blair was quite the godlike superman she had supposed. There even flashed through her mind a sinister speculation as to whether, when you came right down to it, he wasn't something of a pill.
P. G. Wodehouse
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I am Psmith," said the old Etonian reverently. "There is a preliminary P before the name. This, however, is silent. Like the tomb. Compare such words as ptarmigan, psalm, and phthisis.
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I laughed derisively. "For goodness' sake, don't start gargling now. This is serious." "I was laughing." "Oh, were you? Well, I'm glad to see you taking it in this merry spirit." "Derisively," I explained.
P. G. Wodehouse
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It is never difficult to distinguish between a Scotsman with a grievance and a ray of sunshine.
P. G. Wodehouse
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In boxing the right cross-counter is distinctly one of those things it is more blessed to give than to receive.
P. G. Wodehouse
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Gussie, a glutton for punishment, stared at himself in the mirror.
P. G. Wodehouse
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I clutched at the brow. The mice in my interior had now got up an informal dance and were buck-and-winging all over the place like a bunch of Nijinskys.
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He looked haggard and careworn, like a Borgia who has suddenly remembered that he has forgotten to shove cyanide in the consommé, and the dinner-gong due any moment.
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To persons of spirit like ourselves the only happy marriage is that which is based on a firm foundation of almost incessant quarrelling.
P. G. Wodehouse
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He's engaged to be married to Stiffy Byng, and his long years of football should prove an excellent preparation for setting up house with her. The way I look at it is that when a fellow has had plug-uglies in cleated boots doing a Shuffle-off-to-Buffalo on his face Saturday after Saturday since he was a slip of a boy, he must get to fear nothing, not even marriage with a girl like Stiffy, who from early childhood has seldom let the sun go down without starting some loony enterprise calculated to bleach the hair of one and all.
P. G. Wodehouse
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... "someone tried to assasinate Lenin with a rewolwer. That is our (Russia's) great national sport, you see."
P. G. Wodehouse
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What you want, my lad, and what you're going to get are two very different things.
P. G. Wodehouse
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I don't know if you have ever seen a tiger of the jungle drawing a deep breath preparatory to doing a swan dive and landing with both the feet on the backbone of one of the minor fauna. Probably not, nor, as a matter of fact, have I.
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Dark hair fell in a sweep over his forehead. He looked like a man who would write vers libre, as indeed he did.
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A man's subconscious self is not the ideal companion. It lurks for the greater part of his life in some dark den of its own, hidden away, and emerges only to taunt and deride and increase the misery of a miserable hour.
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I'd always thought her half-baked, but now I think they didn't even put her in the oven.
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They were real golfers, for real golf is a thing of the spirit, not of mere mechanical excellence of stroke.
P. G. Wodehouse
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He gave her some chocolates to eat in the Tube. He entertained her with amazing statistics, culled from the weekly paper which he bought on Tuesdays. He was, in short, the perfect lover.
P. G. Wodehouse
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I was in rare fettle and the heart had touched a new high. I don't know anything that braces one up like finding you haven't got to get married after all.
P. G. Wodehouse
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I should think it extremely improbable that anyone ever wrote for money. Naturally, when he has written something, he wants to get as much for it as he can, but that is a very different thing from writing for money.
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I always strive, when I can, to spread sweetness and light. There have been several complaints about it.
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She's one of those soppy girls, riddled from head to foot with whimsy. She holds the view that the stars are God's daisy chain, that rabbits are gnomes in attendance on the Fairy Queen, and that every time a fairy blows its wee nose a baby is born, which, as we know, is not the case. She's a drooper.
P. G. Wodehouse
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Quote of the day
No written law has ever been more binding than unwritten custom supported by popular opinion.
Carrie Chapman Catt
P. G. Wodehouse
Creative Commons
Born:
October 15, 1881
Died:
February 14, 1975
(aged 93)
Bio:
Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse was an English author and one of the most widely read humorists of the 20th century.
Known for:
Right Ho, Jeeves (1934)
Leave It to Psmith (1923)
The Code of the Woosters (1938)
The Inimitable Jeeves (1923)
Blandings Castle and Elsewhere (1935)
Most used words:
man
life
aunt
jeeves
time
sir
sort
love
looked
girl
voice
golf
moment
feel
eye
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