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Every generation of humans believed it had all the answers it needed, except for a few mysteries they assumed would be solved at any moment. And they all believed their ancestors were simplistic and deluded. What are the odds that you are the first generation of humans who will understand reality?
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The best you can hope for in a relationship is to find someone whose flaws are the sort you don't mind. It is futile to look for someone who has no flaws, or someone who is capable of significant change; that sort of person exists only in our imaginations.
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Named after the great romaine emperor, Julius Salad.
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The main difference between marketing and fraud is that criminals have to pay for their own alcohol.
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You might think the word homemade is just a word we use as a marketing ploy. But what you don't realize is that the staff sleeps here at night. If your tablecloth is wrinkled, that's why.
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The best any human can do is to pick a delusion that helps him get through the day
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If you think it's easy to write jokes about fried calamari, you've probably never tried.
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The world isn't fair, but as long as it's tilting in my direction I find that there's a natural cap to my righteous indignation.
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If our mushrooms make you hallucinate, please inform us immediately so we can overcharge you.
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We use only the finest days of the week in this dish.
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Nothing defines humans better than their willingness to do irrational things in the pursuit of phenomenally unlikely payoffs. This is the principle behind lotteries, dating, and religion.
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As you know, the best way to solve a problem is to identify the core belief that causes the problem; then mock that belief until the people who hold it insist that you heard them wrong.
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If you don't believe your salmon is wild, ask it to fetch your newspaper and see what happens.
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On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape key.
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Life is half delicious yogurt, half crap, and your job is to keep the plastic spoon in the yogurt.
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Consultants have credibility because they are not dumb enough to work at your company.
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Always remember that as long as other people are gullible, there's no limit to what you can achieve.
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Quote of the day
Autumn burned brightly, a running flame through the mountains, a torch flung to the trees.
Faith Baldwin
Scott Adams
Born:
June 8, 1957
(age 66)
Bio:
Scott Raymond Adams is an American cartoonist, creator of the Dilbert comic strip and the author of several nonfiction works of satire, commentary, business, and general speculation.
Known for:
God's Debris (2001)
The Religion War (2004)
Dilbert (1996)
Dogbert's Top Secret Management Handbook (1996)
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