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He [Alexander] was often extremely brutal to his captives, whom he sold into slavery, tortured to death, or forced to learn Greek.
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We have no Common Vipers in the United States, but we have worse.
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Most people erroneously call this snake the Puff Adder, Beach Adder, or Blowing Viper. So, naturally, they kill it.
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He [Pericles] reduced the power of the Council of the Areopagus, a group of feeble old men who held their jobs for life and whose duty it was to declare everything null and void… [Footnote:] He also revoked their right to censor the private lives of the citizens. This was nasty of Pericles, for about the only pleasure the old fellows had was catching some citizen doing what he shouldn't. After that, they had to use their imaginations.
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As for Lucrezia, there wasn't even a rumor in her own day that the strawberries at her Wednesday luncheons were dipped in sugar of lead and the other dishes tastefully sprayed with antimony, hellebore, corrosive sublimate, and deadly nightshade, all popular Renaissance flavors.
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The Age of Reptiles ended because it had gone on long enough and it was all a mistake in the first place. A better day was dawning at the close of the Mesozoic Era. There were some little warm-blooded animals around which had been stealing and eating the eggs of the Dinosaurs, and they were gradually learning to steal other things, too. Civilization was just around the corner.
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Philip [II of Spain] was a great believer in diplomacy, or the art of lying. He fooled some of the people some of the time.
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Pericles was the people's friend. [Footnote: The very poorest citizens had a chance to become President, but somehow they didn't. It may have been just a coincidence.] He was so fond of the people that he paid them to go to the Assembly and vote, and they were so fond of him that they elected him year after year.
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Great men seem to have only one purpose in life — getting into history. That may be all they are good for.
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I am billed as a humorist, but of course I am a tragedian at heart.
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The Mexicans gave the Spaniards malaria, and the Spaniards gave the Mexicans smallpox, whooping cough, diphtheria, and syphilis. The Spaniards believed it was better to give than to receive.
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Carthage was governed by its rich men and was therefore a plutocracy. Rome was also governed by its rich men and was therefore a republic.
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Taking elephants across the Alps is not as much fun as it sounds. The Alps are difficult enough when alone, and elephants are peculiarly fitted for not crossing them.
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The Garter Snake or Striped Snake is our most abundant North American serpent. Although they are always getting killed or driven from their natural homes, there are just as many Garter Snakes as ever, and I can tell you the reason. Garter Snakes are crazy about sex and they don't care who knows it.
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You are a bug only if you belong to the order Hemiptera, formerly the suborder Heteroptera. Is that clear now?
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Galvani was mistaken about the amount of electricity in frogs, but he had some good ideas, too, for the galvanometer is named in his honor, and you don't have galvanometers named after you merely for making a mistake about a frog.
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His kick is less severe than that of the Ostrich, which easily breaks a man's leg. The Emu's kick seldom breaks more than the fibula, the smaller bone of the leg, leaving the tibia in first-class condition.
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It is the chief function of the ichthyologists, or fish people, to keep pointing out, day after day, the perfect fitness of fish for existence in a liquid medium. And they're right, at that. But I sometimes think that if fish were not well adapted for an aquatic life — if they were square, say — then it would be time to talk.
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The hippopotamus looks monogamous- he looks as if he would have to be.
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Vipers show you what Mother Nature can think up when she puts her mind to it.
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I am often asked why Mosquitoes hum loudest when close to one's ear. I don't know.
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As a rule fish in their native element do not remain stationary for any length of time, especially when something is chasing them.
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Amoebas not only divide, they also blend. When it's all over there is one amoeba where there were two. Amoebas blend apparently because they enjoy blending for its own sake. The amoeba often frequents laboratories. You'll find quite a number of amoebas at Yale, Princeton, and Harvard.
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Fish are very easy to understand because only about thirteen thousand kinds or species have been discovered up to now.
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The wren-box problem is becoming more acute each year, for wrens now demand better housing conditions and labor-saving devices.
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Quote of the day
No written law has ever been more binding than unwritten custom supported by popular opinion.
Carrie Chapman Catt
Will Cuppy
Born:
August 23, 1884
Died:
September 19, 1949
(aged 65)
Bio:
William Jacob "Will" Cuppy was an American humorist and literary critic, known for his satirical books about nature and historical figures.
Known for:
How to Attract the Wombat (1949)
How to tell your friends from the apes (1931)
How to Become Extinct (1941)
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