Mindy Kaling Quotes

57 Sourced Quotes

My version of an Irish exit has an air of deception to it, because it includes my asking loudly, Where's the bathroom? and making theatrical looking-around gestures like a lost foreign tourist. But then, instead of finding the bathroom, I sneakily grab my coat and leave.

Mindy Kaling
Albums that remind me of my childhood happiness make me incredibly sad now.

Mindy Kaling
Everyone has a moment when they discover they love Amy Poehler.

Mindy Kaling
When I was twenty-five, I went on exactly four dates with a much older guy whom I'll call Peter Parker. I'm calling him Peter Parker because the actual guy's name was also alliterative, and because, well, it's my book and I'll name a guy I dated after Spider-Man's alter ego if I want to.

Mindy Kaling
If I'm at a party where I'm not enjoying myself, I will put some cookies in my jacket pocket and leave without saying good-bye.

Mindy Kaling
In psychology (okay, Twilight) they teach you about the notion of imprinting, and I think it applies here. I reverse-imprinted with athleticism. Ours is the great non-love story of my life.

Mindy Kaling
Maybe the point is that any marriage is work, but you may as well pick work that you like.

Mindy Kaling
I'm the kind of person who would rather get my hopes up really high and watch them get dashed to pieces than wisely keep my expectations at bay and hope they are exceeded. This quality has made me a needy and theatrical friend, but has given me a spectacularly dramatic emotional life.

Mindy Kaling
As my mom has said, when one person is unhappy, it usually means two people are unhappy but that one has not come to terms with it yet.

Mindy Kaling
Besides, who wants to read about success, anyway? Successful serial murderers, maybe.

Mindy Kaling
My parents were supportive of my creativity but did not have a lot of patience for whimsy with zero production value. They had stuff to do.

Mindy Kaling
Write your own part. It is the only way I've gotten anywhere. It is much harder work, but sometimes you have to take destiny into your own hands.

Mindy Kaling
People ask me all the time how I got hired onto the Office. Another common question is how do I manage to stay so down-to-earth in the face of such incredible success?... A third frequently asked question is: "Girl, where you from? Trinidad? Guyana? Dominican Republic? You married? You got kids?" This is mostly asked by guys on the sidewalk selling I LOVE NEW YORK paraphernalia in New York City.

Mindy Kaling
So I'm into men now, even though they can be frightening. I want a schedule-keeping, waking-up-early, wallet-carrying, non-Velcro-shoe-wearing man.

Mindy Kaling
When I was a kid, my parents smartly raised us to keep quiet, be respectful to older people, and generally not question adults all that much. I think that's because they were assuming that 99 percent of the time, we'd be interacting with worthy, smart adults... They didn't ever tell me 'Sometimes you will meet idiots who are technically adults and authority figures. You don't have to do what they say.

Mindy Kaling
I don't want to hear about the endless struggles to keep sex exciting, or the work it takes to plan a date night. I want to hear that you guys watch every episode of The Bachelorette together in secret shame, or that one got the other hooked on Breaking Bad and if either watches it without the other, they're dead meat. I want to see you guys high-five each other like teammates on a recreational softball team you both do for fun.

Mindy Kaling
One friend with whom you have a lot in common is better than three with whom you struggle to find things to talk about.

Mindy Kaling
There is no sunrise so beautiful that it is worth waking me up to see it.

Mindy Kaling
I just want ambitious teenagers to know it is totally fine to be quite, observant kids. Besides being a delight to your parents, you will find you have plenty of time later to catch up.

Mindy Kaling
You might also see that some of my playlists are simply two songs on repeat fifteen times, like I'm a psycho getting pumped up to murder the president.

Mindy Kaling
For heaven's sake, if you don't know someone's name, just pretend you do. Do that thing everyone else does, where you vaguely say, Nice to see you! and make weak eye contact.

Mindy Kaling
I initially thought you were ugly, but then you walked closer to me and I realized you were pretty.

Mindy Kaling
It makes me cry because it means that fewer and fewer people are believing it's cool to want what I want, which is to be married and have kids and love each other in a monogamous, long-lasting relationship.

Mindy Kaling
What I've noticed is that almost no one who was a big star in high school is also big star later in life. For us overlooked kids, it's so wonderfully fair.

Mindy Kaling
Nothing gives you confidence like being a member of a small, weirdly specific, hard-to-find demographic.

Mindy Kaling