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Lizz Winstead Quotes

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One of the first things Catholic school taught me is that babies were born sinners. You sucked before you took your first breath.

Lizz Winstead
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Nebraska is proof that hell is full and the dead are walking the earth.

Lizz Winstead
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Before the Internet and speed dating, blind dates were the gold standard of unrealistic attempts at forced intimacy.

Lizz Winstead
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And home pregnancy tests? They are so last century. Nowadays, I think there's an app that calls your iPhone to warn you that if you finish that third cosmo, you may wind up with a wombmate.

Lizz Winstead
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By some fluke, my folks forgot to ask me the question most crucial to ensuring a lifetime of self-doubt: 'What if you fail?

Lizz Winstead
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I suppose the difference between baby people and me is that I do not consider smiling while farting 'holding up your end of a conversation.

Lizz Winstead

Quote of the day

The modern mind is in complete disarray. Knowledge has stretched itself to the point where neither the world nor our intelligence can find any foot-hold. It is a fact that we are suffering from nihilism.
Albert Camus

Lizz Winstead

Lizz Winstead
Creative Commons

Born: August 5, 1961 (age 63)
Bio: Lizz Winstead is an American comedian, radio, and television personality, and blogger. A native of Minnesota, Winstead is co-creator of The Daily Show along with Madeleine Smithberg, and served as head writer.

WikipediaLizz Winstead on Wikipedia

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