Columnist Quotes

There was scarcely a woman alive, it seemed, who could resist the urge to haul men down onto beds, car seats, kitchen floors, dining-room tables, park grass, parlor sofas, or packing crates, entwine warm thighs around them, and pant in ecstasy.

A rule of thumb in the matter of medical advice is to take everything any doctor says with a grain of aspirin.

It's much harder to be a liberal than a conservative. Why? Because it is easier to give someone the finger than a helping hand.

Behold the mighty Dinosaur, Famous in prehistoric lore, Not only for his weight and strength But for his intellectual length. You will observe by these remains The creature had two sets of brains— One in his head (the usual place), The other at his spinal base. Thus he could reason a priori As well as a posteriori.

Bert Leston Taylor

The most popular labour-saving device today is still a husband with money.

The times you don't make it are the ones children remember, not the times you do.

Allison Pearson

Money won't buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of a large research staff to study the problem.

William E. Vaughan

Marriage is like a warm bath. Once you get used to it, it's not so hot.

A dying man needs to die, as a sleepy man needs to sleep, and there comes a time when it is wrong, as well as useless, to resist.

A tiny terror who wore brass knuckles on his tongue, he frequently retaliated with knockout assessments of those he judged disloyal or simply disliked.

While it is a misfortune to a woman never to be loved, it is a tragedy to her never to love.

'The land of the free' is now the land of the free to be rude...

The beauty of the natural world lies in the details, and most of those details are not the stuff of calendar art.

The attempt to silence a man is the greatest honor you can bestow on him. It means that you recognize his superiority to yourself.

Let me remember that each life must follow its own course, and that what happens to other people has absolutely nothing to do with what happens to me.

Marjorie Holmes

Women without men are usually nervous.... The important thing is to have a man, even if you just like him. Pleasing him, you will please yourself.

There are moments that stop the heart, that catch the breath, that halt the beat of blood in your veins, and you are suspended in time, held between life and death, and you wait for something to bring you back again.