Kate Clinton Quotes

14 Sourced Quotes

In right field we had a woman who was a therapist. As a right fielder, she was a wonderful therapist.... Whenever a fly popped up to center, she could be heard saying to the center fielder, 'I believe in your skills; I support you in your effort to catch the ball.'

Kate Clinton
Like those itinerant clerics who traveled during the summer months and took over for vacationing priests, I hope to help out this summer in Provincetown, but without the pedophilia.

Kate Clinton
On airlines, so many passengers' faces are buried in John Grisham books, they could be complimentary copies for Grisham Airlines.

Kate Clinton
The Administration's policy on women is often hard to see because it is written in the font size of pharmaceutical ads.

Kate Clinton
When the Lord of the Wedding Rings held his no-questions-asked press conference, he said he was sorely "troubled." At last, I thought, an admission. But no, he wasn't talking about his mental condition.

Kate Clinton
Whenever a woman describes herself as a 'post-feminist' I picture women lashed to posts. Joan of Arc was an early post-feminist.

Kate Clinton
FYI: The Summer of Gay has been extended into the Year of the Queer. Another heads up: Mad Vow Disease, once limited to wholesome, unimpeachable gay couples earnestly seeking to take on the rights and responsibilities of marriage, has jumped the pen and crossed into the general population.

Kate Clinton
Like red meat thrown before the Atkins crowd in the Republican Party, the initiative would teach problem solving, negotiating, and listening skills, which might then trickle up to the Bush Administration.

Kate Clinton
And they picketh it up and laideth it in a Ziploc bag

Kate Clinton
Of all sports, football seems to be the most sanctioned homosocial opportunity for straight men to be with each other, pat butts, struggle, strive, and take showers together. All that talk of tight ends and penetration. The reason there are face masks on those helmets is so that can't kiss each other.

Kate Clinton
After the Reagan years, there were only three people of color in the Republican Party. Their slogan was 'Republicans - the Other White Meat.' George [H.] Bush tried to dispel the 'whites only' image of his party, often referring to his Mexican-American grandkids as 'the little brown ones over there,' and nominated Clarence Uncle Thomas to the Supreme Court.

Kate Clinton
Each time we had a visiting writer, I asked what she thought of women and humor. By the end of the year, I had perfected my question and asked Adrienne Rich why there was so little written about women and humor. She looked at me right in the eye and said, 'You write it.' I took that as an order.

Kate Clinton
Gays have always been in the military. Alexander the Great was originally Alexander the Fabulous. A gay man invented C-rations. He claims he could never talk anyone into the cilantro garnish. Obviously, gays were not allowed to design the outfits, because we never would have stayed with the earth tones for so long.

Kate Clinton
Laughter takes the tyranny of the lies we are told and told and told and it blows them apart.

Kate Clinton