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909 Sourced Quotes
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In brightest day, in blackest night, No evil shall escape my sight. Let those who worship evil's might Beware my power, Green Lantern's light!
Anonymous
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If you add the candle ends together you get a whole candle.
Anonymous
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Like the statistician who was drowned in a lake of average depth six inches.
Anonymous
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"Where are you going to, my pretty maid?"
"I'm going a-milking, sir," she said.
Anonymous
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Instead of being arrested, as we stated, for kicking his wife down a flight of stairs and hurling a lighted kerosene lamp after her, the Revd James P. Wellman died unmarried four years ago.
Anonymous
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When elephants fight it is the grass that suffers.
Anonymous
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She was poor, but she was honest,
Victim of the squire's whim:
For he wooed and he seduced her,
And she had a child by him.
Anonymous
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The world is full of fools, and he who would not see it should live alone and smash his mirror.
Anonymous
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I had a little nut tree, nothing would it bear But a silver nutmeg and a golden pear; The king of Spain's daughter came to visit me, And all for the sake of my little nut tree.
Anonymous
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The secret of getting ahead is getting started. The secret of getting started is breaking your complex, overwhelming tasks into small, manageable tasks, and then starting on the first one.
Anonymous
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An old joke about the Irish:
Victor Lewis Smith:
You clearly don't know the difference between a Joist and a Girder.
Irish Builder:
Yes I do. Joist wrote Ulysses and Girder wrote Faust.
Anonymous
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There was a crooked man, and he went a crooked mile, He found a crooked sixpence against a crooked stile; He bought a crooked cat, which caught a crooked mouse, And they all lived together in a little crooked house.
Anonymous
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Capitalism contains within it the seeds of its own destruction.
Anonymous
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Kill then, and bliss me,
But first come kiss me.
Anonymous
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They say it is better to be poor and happy than rich and miserable, but how about a compromise like moderately rich and just moody?
Anonymous
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The dove says, Coo, coo, what shall I do?
I can scarce maintain two.
Pooh, pooh, says the wren, I have ten,
And keep them all like gentlemen.
Anonymous
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Quarry mine, blessed am I In the luck of the chase. Comes the deer to my singing.
Anonymous
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Pat-a-cake, pat-a-cake, baker's man,
Bake me a cake as fast as you can;
Pat it and prick it, and mark it with B,
Put it in the oven for baby and me.
Anonymous
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No beauty she doth miss,
When all her robes are on;
But beauty's self she is,
When all her robes are gone.
Anonymous
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Love conquers all things—except poverty and toothache.
Often misattributed to Mae West
Anonymous
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There was a young man from Peru
Whose limericks stopped at line two.
Anonymous
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Listen!
The fame of Danish kings
in days gone by, the daring feats
worked by those heroes are well known to us.
Anonymous
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There are three sides to every argument: my side, your side and the truth.
Anonymous
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I don't like the family Stein!
There is Gert, there is Ep, there is Ein.
Gert's writings are punk,
Ep's statues are junk,
Nor can anyone understand Ein.
Anonymous
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Definition of a sports car: a hedge against male menopause.
Anonymous
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Quote of the day
Be a sinner and sin strongly, but more strongly have faith and rejoice in Christ.
Martin Luther
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