Harry Hill Quotes

13 Sourced Quotes

It's nice to see one or two bald men in the audience [...] Was it the same for you, sir, you just noticed it was taking longer and longer to wash your face?

Harry Hill
Apple left the fruit union did very well mmm mmm! Got a pie, got a sauce.

Harry Hill
Apparently, there's enough poison in a crab, to kill a crab.

Harry Hill
Apparently you can tell a lot about someone's personality from what they're like.

Harry Hill
If you drop a bible from a height you can kill a field mouse; so maybe the bible isn't all good.

Harry Hill
My father always used to say 'always fight fire with fire', and that's why he got thrown out of the the fire brigade.

Harry Hill
My dad used to like my mom to get dressed up as a nurse. But then he used to like her to go out to work... as a nurse! A little bit of extra money, you see...

Harry Hill
I never saw my grand dad. No, i never saw him... Because he was excellent at hiding.

Harry Hill
Little tip for short people: How to appear taller? Pretend the reason you look so small is that you are in fact in the distance.

Harry Hill
He remembers when lizards were fish. That's how old he is!

Harry Hill
I've got a sister in Australia, so when I phone her up there is a slight delay on the line after I've spoken because she's a bit thick.

Harry Hill
The left side of the brain is responsible for speech, but then it would say that.

Harry Hill
You're probably like me, when your doorbell rings, your dog goes racing up to the door...but it's never for him, is it? "Who did you think it was going to be, one of your little friends?"

Harry Hill