Harriet Lerner - The Dance of Anger (1985)

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If what we are doing with our anger is not achieving the desired result, it would seem logical to try something else.

Harriet Lerner

Those of us who are locked into ineffective expressions of anger suffer as deeply as those of us who dare not get angry at all.

Harriet Lerner

Many of our problems with anger occur when we choose between having a relationship and having a self.

Harriet Lerner

Underground issues from one relationship or context invariably fuel our fires in another.

Harriet Lerner

Anger is a tool for change when it challenges us to become more of an expert on the self and less of an expert on others.

Harriet Lerner

We cannot make another person change his or her steps to an old dance, but if we change our own steps, the dance no longer can continue in the same predictable pattern.

Harriet Lerner

It is an act of courage to acknowledge our own uncertainty and sit with it for a while.

Harriet Lerner