Finley Peter Dunne - Mr. Dooley's Opinions (1901)

15 Sourced Quotes

View all Finley Peter Dunne Quotes
No wan cares to hear what Hogan calls "Th' short an' simple scandals iv th' poor."

Finley Peter Dunne
"D' ye think th' colledges has much to do with th' progress iv th' wurruld?" asked Mr. Hennessy. "D' ye think," said Mr. Dooley, " 'tis th' mill that makes th' wather run?"

Finley Peter Dunne
I think a lie with a purpose is wan iv th' worst kind an' th' mos' profitable.

Finley Peter Dunne
Th' dimmycratic party ain't on speakin' terms with itsilf.

Finley Peter Dunne
Among men, Hinnissy, wet eye manes dhry heart.

Finley Peter Dunne
'Twas founded be th' Puritans to give thanks f'r bein' presarved fr'm th' Indians, an'…we keep it to give thanks we are presarved fr'm th' Puritans.

Finley Peter Dunne
A man that'd expict to thrain lobsters to fly in a year is called a loonytic; but a man that thinks men can be tur-rned into angels be an iliction is called a rayformer an' remains at large.

Finley Peter Dunne
"I think," said Mr. Dooley, "that if th' Christyan Scientists had some science an' th' doctors more Christianity, it wudden't make anny diff'rence which ye called in—if ye had a good nurse."

Finley Peter Dunne
'Tis as hard f'r a rich man to enther th' kingdom iv Hiven as it is f'r a poor man to get out iv Purgatory.

Finley Peter Dunne
No matther whether th' constitution follows th' flag or not, th' supreme coort follows th' iliction returns.

Finley Peter Dunne
In England a man is presoomed to be innocent till he's proved guilty an' they take it f 'r granted he's guilty. In this counthry a man is presoomed to be guilty ontil he's proved guilty an' afther that he's presoomed to be innocent.

Finley Peter Dunne
Miracles are laughed at be a nation that r-reads thirty millyon newspapers a day an' supports Wall sthreet.

Finley Peter Dunne
Hogan's r-right whin he says: "Justice is blind." Blind she is, an' deef an' dumb an' has a wooden leg.

Finley Peter Dunne
Though I have patches on me pantaloons, I've ne'er a wan on me intestines.

Finley Peter Dunne
Mickrobes is a vigitable, an' ivry man is like a conservatory full iv millyons iv these potted plants.

Finley Peter Dunne