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Miami... the floating-human-body-parts capital of America.
Carl Hiaasen
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In his own mind, it was never a matter of courage. But courage it was.
Carl Hiaasen
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The Dragon Queen was firm: No sex, no more voodoo curses on Christopher.
Carl Hiaasen
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There is no writer's block in a newsroom. There's only unemployment block.
Carl Hiaasen
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He wondered if something was mentally wrong with him for being content with what he had.
Carl Hiaasen
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The dog proved to be as dumb and stubborn as a mud fence, so Stranahan had named him Strom.
Carl Hiaasen
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The evening news made her wonder if God was dead; the morning sun made her believe He wasn't.
Carl Hiaasen
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The victim's hand was contracted into a fist except for the middle digit, which was rigidly extended.
Carl Hiaasen
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Jimmy Lee Baylis was a wise man, and knew better than to talk back to the man who signed his paycheck.
Carl Hiaasen
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Mickey Cray had been out of work ever since a dead iguana fell from a palm tree and hit him on the head.
Carl Hiaasen
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That's what people do when they find a special place that wild and full of life, they trample it to death.
Carl Hiaasen
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Sunset on the water ought to be a quiet and easy time, but I guess some people can't stand a little silence.
Carl Hiaasen
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Actually it was the mark of the stupid, which is what you get for sitting under a tree during a thunderstorm.
Carl Hiaasen
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The message, never stated but avuncularly implied, is that America's values ought to reflect those of the Walt Disney Company and not the other way around.
Carl Hiaasen
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Mrs. Bonneville never buckled her seat belt, even though it was required by state law; an ardent libertarian, she opposed government meddling in all matters of personal choice.
Carl Hiaasen
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The man's a born straggler, Honey thought, another lucky exception to the rules of natural selection. A million years ago he would've been an easy snack for a saber-toothed tiger.
Carl Hiaasen
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If you picked the headlines from the five largest newspapers in Florida every day, you could make a very solid case that the human race was slipping backward into the primal ooze.
Carl Hiaasen
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Mr. Cabal's lawyer didn't appreciate your description of his client as 'yellow-bellied vermin culled from the stinkpot of Castro's jails for discharge at Mariel's harbor of shame.
Carl Hiaasen
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Garcia wondered why people with JESUS stickers on their bumper always drove twenty miles per hour under the speed limit. If God was my co-pilot, he thought, I'd be doing a hundred and twenty.
Carl Hiaasen
Quote of the day
Time and trouble will tame an advanced young woman, but an advanced old woman is uncontrollable by any earthly force.
Dorothy L. Sayers
Carl Hiaasen
Born:
March 12, 1953
(age 71)
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