Carl Hiaasen - Florida Quotes

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Florida needs a special prison for tourists. Not all tourists — just the ones who trash the place, rob, shoplift, vandalize, drive drunk, assault the cops, puke in the alleys, pee in the medians, and so on.

Carl Hiaasen

The species has not been elevated by much of what's happened in the last 30 or 40 years. And obviously, it's not just in Florida. The sort of thing that used to happen only in fiction can hardly compare to what's in the news today. The reality of our current politics and the economic meltdown — that's straight out of Tom Wolfe.

Carl Hiaasen

If you picked the headlines from the five largest newspapers in Florida every day, you could make a very solid case that the human race was slipping backward into the primal ooze.

Carl Hiaasen

When I go out and give speeches, the title of my speech is "The Case Against Intelligent Design." And I base it strictly on what I've observed here in Florida, which is that the human race is actually de-evolving, that we are moving backward on the evolutionary scale.

Carl Hiaasen