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When failure is not an option, we can forget about creativity, learning, and innovation.
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Empathy doesn't require that we have the exact same experiences as the person sharing their story with us...Empathy is connecting with the emotion that someone is experiencing, not the event or the circumstance.
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Spirituality is recognizing and celebrating that we are all inextricably connected to each other by a power greater than all of us, and that our connection to that power and to one another is grounded in love and compassion. Practicing spirituality brings a sense of perspective, meaning and purpose to our lives.
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No matter what gets done and how much is left undone, I am enough.
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Until we can receive with an open heart, we are never really giving with an open heart.
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If you want to make a difference, the next time you see someone being cruel to another human being, take it personally. Take it personally because it is personal!
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We live in a world where most people still subscribe to the belief that shame is a good tool for keeping people in line. Not only is this wrong, but it's dangerous. Shame is highly correlated with addiction, violence, aggression, depression, eating disorders, and bullying.
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Shame works like the zoom lens on a camera. When we are feeling shame, the camera is zoomed in tight and all we see is our flawed selves, alone and struggling.
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Vulnerability is not weakness, and the uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure we face every day are not optional. Our only choice is a question of engagement. Our willingness to own and engage with our vulnerability determines the depth of our courage and the clarity of our purpose; the level to which we protect ourselves from being vulnerable is a measure of our fear and disconnection.
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When we spend our lives waiting until we're perfect or bulletproof before we walk into the arena, we ultimately sacrifice relationships and opportunities that may not be recoverable, we squander our precious time, and we turn our backs on our gifts, those unique contributions that only we can make,
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Shame corrodes the very part of us that believes we are capable of change.
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Courage starts with showing up and letting ourselves be seen.
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Nothing has transformed my life more than realizing that it's a waste of time to evaluate my worthiness by weighing the reaction of the people in the stands.
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The question isn't so much, Are you parenting the right way? as it is: Are you the adult you want your child to grow up to be?
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Who we are and how we engage with the world are much stronger predictors of how our children will do than what we know about parenting.
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If we want to be able to move through the difficult disappointments, the hurt feelings, and the heartbreaks that are inevitable in a fully lived life, we can't equate defeat with being unworthy of love, belonging and joy. If we do, we'll never show up and try again.
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Our sense of belonging can never be greater than our level of self acceptance.
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To live with courage, purpose, and connection - to be the person whom we long to be - we must again be vulnerable. We must... show up, and let ourselves be seen.
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I'm not a parenting expert. In fact, I'm not sure that I even believe in the idea of 'parenting experts.' I'm an engaged, imperfect parent and a passionate researcher. I'm an experienced mapmaker and a stumbling traveler. Like many of you, parenting is by far my boldest and most daring adventure.
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Let go of who you think you're supposed to be and embrace who you are.
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Who we are matters immeasurably more than what we know or who we want to be.
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What we know matters, but who we are matters more. Being rather than knowing requires showing up and letting ourselves be seen. It requires us to dare greatly, to be vulnerable.
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Living a connected life ultimately is about setting boundaries, spending less time and energy hustling and winning over people who don't matter, and seeing the value of working on cultivating connection with family and close friends.
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We don't have to be perfect, just engaged and committed to aligning values with actions.
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I carry a small sheet of paper in my wallet that has written on it the names of people whose opinions of me matter. To be on that list, you have to love me for my strengths and struggles.
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Love is not something we give or get; it is something that we nurture and grow, a connection that can only be cultivated between two people when it exists within each one of them- we can only love others as much as we love ourselves. Shame, blame, disrespect, betrayal, and the withholding of affection damage the roots from which love grows. Love can only survive these injuries if they are acknowledged, healed, and rare.
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There is no intimacy without vulnerability. Yet another powerful example of vulnerability as courage.
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Perfection is crucial in building an aircraft, a bridge, or a high-speed train. The code and mathematics residing just below the surface of the Internet is also this way. Things are either perfectly right or they will not work. So much of the world we work and live in is based upon being correct, being perfect.
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Even to me the issue of "stay small, sweet, quiet, and modest" sounds like an outdated problem, but the truth is that women still run into those demands whenever we find and use our voices.
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We cultivate love when we allow our most vulnerable and powerful selves to be deeply seen and known, and when we honor the spiritual connection that grows from that offering with trust, respect, kindness and affection
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Quote of the day
Women and men in the crowd meet and mingle, Yet with itself every soul standeth single.
Alice Cary
Brené Brown
Creative Commons
Born:
November 18, 1965
(age 59)
Bio:
Brené Brown is an American scholar, author, and public speaker, who is currently a research professor at the University of Houston Graduate College of Social Work.
Known for:
Rising Strong (2015)
Gifts of Imperfection (2010)
I thought it was just me (2007)
Most used words:
shame
vulnerability
people
connection
lives
courage
love
belonging
vulnerable
time
fear
truth
feel
purpose
power
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