Bert Kalmar - Duck Soup (1933)

6 Sourced Quotes

View all Bert Kalmar Quotes

Groucho Marx: I could dance with you till the cows come home. On second thoughts, I'd rather dance with the cows till you came home.

Bert Kalmar

Remember, you're fighting for this woman's honour…which is probably more than she ever did.

Bert Kalmar

If you can't leave in a taxi you can leave in a huff. If that's too soon, you can leave in a minute and a huff.

Bert Kalmar | Groucho Marx

Why a four-year-old child could understand this report. Run out and find me a four-year-old child. I can't make head nor tail out of it.

Groucho Marx | Bert Kalmar

Trentino (Louis Calhern): I am willing to do anything to prevent this war.
Firefly (Groucho Marx): It's too late. I've already paid a month's rent on the battlefield.

Bert Kalmar

Chicolini here may talk like an idiot, and look like an idiot, but don't let that fool you: he really is an idiot.

Bert Kalmar