Here is the vicious circle: if you feel separate from your organic life, you feel driven to survive; survival -going on living- thus becomes a duty and also a drag because you are not fully with it; because it does not quite come up to expectations, you continue to hope that it will, to crave for more time, to feel driven all the more to go on.
The Joyous Cosmology: Adventures in the Chemistry of Consciousness (ed. New World Library, 2013) - ISBN: 9781608682041