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Sarah Dessen -
Just Listen (2006)
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If someone is really close with you, your getting upset or them getting upset is okay, and they don't change because of it. It's just part of the relationship. It happens. You deal with it.
Sarah Dessen
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Really? Screaming? He shrugged. It wasn't that bad. But there were definitely some freak-outs on both sides. Though, to be honest, the silence was worse. Worse than screaming? I said. Much, he said, nodding. I mean, at least with an argument, you know what's happening. Or have some idea. Silence is… it could be anything. It's just – So freaking loud, I finished for him. He pointed at me. Exactly.
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It's a choice, Annabel. And if you make the wrong one, you have only yourself to blame when there are consequences.
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I wasn't ready for this, but then I probably never would be, and this year, like so much else, wouldn't wait. I had no choice but to get out of my car, with everyone watching and begin in earnest, alone. So I did
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The kind who live for music and are constantly seeking it out, anywhere they can. Who can't imagine a life without it. They're enlightened.
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Only a real asshole takes liberties with someone else's car stereo. That's serious.
Sarah Dessen
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This was how I was dealing with everyone and everything lately, taking the good when it came, and the bad the same way, knowing each would pass in its own time.
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I don't lie." "You don't lie," I repeated. "That's what I said." "Ever." "Nope." Sure you don't, I thought.
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Whether it was a song, a person, or a story, there was a lot you couldn't know from just an excerpt, a glance, or part of a chorus.
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She knew I could tell with one glance, one look, one simple instant. It was her eyes. Despite the thick makeup, they were still dark-rimmed., haunted, and sad. Most of all though, they were familiar. The fact that we were in front of hundreds of strangers changed nothing at all. I'd spent a summer with those same eyes-scared, lost, confused-staring back at me. I would have known them anywhere.
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It is kind of hard to hold a lot in. But for me… it's sometimes even harder to let it out.
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I wondered which was harder, in the end. The act of telling, or who you told it to. Or maybe if, when you finally got it out, the story was really all that mattered.
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It was becoming clear to me that I shouldn't bother to get too attached to anything. Turn your back and you lose it. Just like that.
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I understood now. This voice, the one that had been trying to get my attention all this time, calling out to me, begging me to hear it — it wan't Will's. It was mine.
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I was beginning to see, though, that the unknown wasn't always the greatest thing to fear. The people who know you best can be risker, because the words they say and things they think have the potential to be not only scary but true, as well.
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I sat up, sliding them off, and the quiet around me did not, for once, seem empty and vast. Instead, for the first time in a while, it felt like it already was full.
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If you could just be nice, then you wouldn't have to worry about arguments at all. but being nice wasn't as easy as it seemed, especially when the rest of the world could be so mean.
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But you could also look at it the other way. Like you're saying no matter how bad things are for you, I can still relate.
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I was so scared about being discovered, but nobody came. Nobody heard. In my own ears, though, my sobs sounded primal and scary, like something I would have turned off if I'd been able to.
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All you could do was take on as much weight as you can bear. And if you're lucky, there's someone close enough by to shoulder the rest.
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So many versions of just one memory, and yet none of them were right or wrong. Instead, they were all pieces. Only when fitted together, edge to edge, could they even begin to tell the whole story.
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How it seemed like you could see everything, but certain things were blocked out, hidden.
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If you were dead," Owen told her, "you'd have bigger problems than what you were wearing.
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The past did affect the present and the future, in ways you could see and a million ones you couldn't. Time wasn't a thing you could divide easily; there was no defined middle or beginning or end. I could pretend to leave the past behind, but it would not leave me.
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Instead, we just sat there, together but really apart, watching a show about a stranger and all her secrets, while keeping our own to ourselves, as always.
Sarah Dessen
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Quote of the day
Chaos is a name for any order that produces confusion in our minds.
George Santayana
Sarah Dessen
Born:
June 6, 1970
(age 53)
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