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Malcolm Azania -
Cosmos
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The self-delusion that mysterious forces and persons unknown are conspiring against us is, surprisingly, a comforting belief, because it means we're significant enough in this anarchic world to warrant someone's enmity. That delusion saves us from the far more difficult to accept reality: that we're not that important to anyone. That the universe just isn't into us.
Paranoia is the emotive-psychestructure's response to feeling ignored, unloved, or forgotten in an existence filled with random acts of destructive indifference emphasizing the inherent futility of life and struggle. If you're ever to achieve serenity, ultimately you must accept that in such a vast cosmos, you simply don't matter very much.
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That uncountable myths and legends and ecclesiastical operas and dirges have at their core, if not in their trappings, near identical mechanisms, performances, and outcomes is proof most solid of the centrality of the panhuman subconscious—or superconscious—experience of the myriad and manifold wonders and terrors of the cosmos.
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Paranoia speaks to a deeper drive than fear. Paranoia is a defiant charge to a cold, unfeeling cosmos: Hear me! I exist! I'm important! Because after all, if someone is actually orchestrating the chaos of the universe against you personally, then you do matter. When no one seems to care anymore, at least enemies give you the comforting illusion that you count.
Malcolm Azania
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Every word she writes is a lie, including 'and' and 'the'.
Mary McCarthy
Malcolm Azania
Born:
1969
(age 55)
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