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Although Freud said happiness is composed of love and work, reality often forces us to choose love or work.
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If family violence teaches children that might makes right at home, how will we hope to cure the futile impulse to solve worldly conflicts with force?
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We need old friends to help us grow old and new friends to help us stay young.
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Mothers remember a child's first words, and quote them in tones usually reserved for Byron.
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Housework is the only activity at which men are allowed to be consistently inept because they are thought to be so competent at everything else.
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If the Richter scale could measure human calamities, the loss of a child would register a ten.
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The High Holy Days of my childhood... embodied the very essence of new beginnings; for autumn, not spring, was when everything was new: my clothes, my classroom, books, pencil box, teachers — and Jewish chronology, which decreed a fresh start, a clean slate, a chance to improve on the past.
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To me, a person's identity is composed of both an 'I' and a 'we.' The 'I' finds itself in love, work, and pleasure, but it also locates itself within some meaningful group identity — a tribe, a community, a 'we.' America is too big and bland a tribe for most of us.
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I feel about mothers the way I feel about dimples: because I do not have one myself, I notice everyone who does.
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When a family is free of abuse and oppression, it can be the place where we share our deepest secrets and stand the most exposed, a place where we learn to feel distinct without being better, - and sacrifice for others without losing ourselves.
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Compared to other parents, remarried parents seem more desirous of their child's approval, more alert to the child's emotional state, and more sensitive in their parent-child relations. Perhaps this is the result of heightened empathy for the child's suffering, perhaps it is a guilt reaction; in either case, it gives the child a potent weapon--the power to disrupt the new household and come between parent and the new spouse.
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I want to visit Memory Lane, I don't want to live there.
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Other than life experience, nothing left a deeper imprint on my formative self than the movies.
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The politics of the family are the politics of a nation. Just as the authoritarian family is the authoritarian state in microcosm, the democratic family is the best training ground for life in a democracy.
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Why hope to live a long life if we're only going to fill it with self-absorption, body maintenance and image repair? When we die, do we want people to exclaim 'She looked ten years younger,' or do we want them to say 'She lived a great life'?
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Like many another romance, the romance of the family turns sour when the money runs out. If we really cared about families, we would not let 'born again' patriarchs send up moral abstractions as a smokescreen for the scandal of American family economics.
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The risk for a woman who considers her helpless children her "job" is that the children's growth toward self-sufficiency may be experienced as a refutation of the mother's indispensability, and she may unconsciously sabotage their growth as a result.
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A toy has no gender and no idea of whether a girl or boy is playing with it.
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I didn't anticipate the primal quality of my pleasure, the raw physicality of it, the way my whole body leaps forward when I see my grandsons after a few days' absence.
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Much is made of the accelerating brutality of young people's crimes, but rarely does our concern for dangerous children translateinto concern for children in danger. We fail to make the connection between the use of force on children themselves, and violent antisocial behavior, or the connection between watching father batter mother and the child deducing a link between violence and masculinity.
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Quote of the day
The people never give up their liberties but under some delusion.
Edmund Burke
Letty Cottin Pogrebin
Creative Commons
Born:
June 9, 1939
(age 79)
Bio:
Loretta "Letty" Cottin Pogrebin is an American author, journalist, lecturer, and social activist.
Known for:
How to Be a Friend to a Friend Who's Sick (2013)
Single Jewish Male Seeking Soul Mate (2015)
Deborah, Golda, and me (1991)
Getting over getting older (1996)
Three daughters (2001)
Most used words:
family
,
children
,
friends
,
life
,
work
,
love
,
mothers
,
power
,
illness
,
feel
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