Larry the Cable Guy - Time Quotes

4 Sourced Quotes

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We always have a tradition at our family reunion, we always have the family tug-of-war, and this year it was my dad's side of the family against my sister-in-law. She wins every year! I swear, she runs on diesel. That's a fat bastard, right there! She went on a diet one time, Little Debbie laid off 500 employees. Last Halloween, she dressed in white, came as a blizzard.

Larry the Cable Guy

At first I didn't even realize she was pregnant. I kinda gotten used to her throwing up every time we had sex...

Larry the Cable Guy

Do deaf people have alarm clocks? I asked a deaf guy that one time, the sumbitch just stared at me.

Larry the Cable Guy

My mom went to that same doctor and got a butt lift. It's a little too lifted, I think, alright. Now every time she farts only dogs can hear it.

Larry the Cable Guy