Joseph Heller Short Quotes

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Climb, you bastard! Climb, climb, climb, climb!

Joseph Heller
Vanity. What's wrong with vanity? It doesn't satisfy.

Joseph Heller
Anything worth dying for... is certainly worth living for.

Joseph Heller
He knew everything about literature except how to enjoy it.

Joseph Heller
When people disagreed with him he urged them to be objective.

Joseph Heller
God had no need for Ecclesiastes to acquaint Him with vanity.

Joseph Heller
Clevinger was dead. That was the basic flaw in his philosophy.

Joseph Heller
He was a self-made man who owed his lack of success to nobody.

Joseph Heller
Didn't I once observe that there is nothing new under the sun?

Joseph Heller
Fortunately, just when things were blackest, the war broke out.

Joseph Heller
Peace on earth would mean the end of civilization as we know it.

Joseph Heller
Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they aren't after you.

Joseph Heller
If Richard Nixon was second-rate, what in the world is third-rate?

Joseph Heller
Major Major never sees anyone in his office while he's in his office.

Joseph Heller
What do you do when it rains?" The captain answered frankly. "I get wet.

Joseph Heller
The promises of maniacs, like those of women, are not safely relied upon.

Joseph Heller
Now you've given them hope, and they're unhappy. So the blame is all yours.

Joseph Heller
A sober God-fearing man whose idea of a good joke was to lie about his age.

Joseph Heller
All through the night, men looked at the sky and were saddened by the stars.

Joseph Heller
Nurse Duckett found Yossarian wonderful and was already trying to change him.

Joseph Heller
When one is infatuated, faults are endearing that in others would be heinous.

Joseph Heller
I don't believe in miracles because it's been a long time since we've had any.

Joseph Heller
They couldn't keep Death out, but while she was in she had to act like a lady.

Joseph Heller
The truth is whatever people will believe is the truth. Don't you know history?

Joseph Heller
I hate God and I hate life. And the closer I come to death, the more I hate life.

Joseph Heller
The enemy is anybody who's going to get you killed, no matter which side he's on.

Joseph Heller
All is vanity, you know, ALL in the long run is but vanity and vexation of spirit.

Joseph Heller
Whether God is dead or not hardly matters, for we would use him no differently anyway.

Joseph Heller
A country is a piece of land surrounded on all sides by boundaries, usually unnatural.

Joseph Heller
I don't think the 'what' distinguishes a good novel from a bad one but rather the 'how.'

Joseph Heller