Jennifer Crusie Quotes

51 Sourced Quotes

There wasn't enough gratitude in the world for a server who kept drinks coming at a time like this.

Jennifer Crusie
Any instructions? Carpenter said. Yeah, Shane said. Shoot anybody who looks at Agnes funny. And anybody else you don't like. I'm getting tired of this shi*. Somebody needs a hug, Carpenter said. Humor, Shane said. Har.

Jennifer Crusie
I'm Min's fairy godmother, Charm Boy,' Liza said, frowning down at him. 'And if you don't give her a happily ever after, I'm going to come back and beat you to death with a snow globe.' What happened to "bibbity bobbity boo"?' Cal asked Min. That was Disney, honey,' Min said. 'It wasn't a documentary.

Jennifer Crusie
Wonder of wonders, the box had Elvis. Immediately the bar seemed a better place. She fed in coins and then punched the keys for "Hound Dog." Too bad Elvis had never recorded one called "Dickhead.

Jennifer Crusie
She was just…beaming at me, and I thought she'd won the lottery or something, her smile was that big. I asked what happened, and she said… Park swallowed again. She said, 'You're here. ' He blinked at Tess. 'You're here.' That's all it was. That big goofy smile just because I was there. Nobody ever smiled like that at me before.

Jennifer Crusie
That's a movie quote, right? You know, if you do that with books, people think you're intelligent." Sophie lowered her chin. "If this is your pathetic attempt to seduce me again, you're falling miserably." "I don't seduce woman." Phin shoved back his chair and stood up. "They fall into my open arms." "Clumsy of them.

Jennifer Crusie
You've always been nuts. That's fine. I can deal with nuts. But lately, you've been depressed nuts. I can't deal with that. - Anthony

Jennifer Crusie
Every species has a dinner date as part of courting ritual. A woman who won't let you pay for dinner is rejecting your courtship. She may think she's playing fair, or that she's being a feminist, but a very deep level, she knows that she's crossing you off her list of possibilities.

Jennifer Crusie
In the bad old days, men kept women from choosing to work. In the bad new days, women keep women from choosing to stay home.

Jennifer Crusie
You know who you remind me of? The kid cop in Lethal Weapon 3. You know, the one who says, 'it's my twenty-first birthday today', and right away you know he's dead meat?

Jennifer Crusie
Have you ever met a woman you wanted to give everything to? just turn over everything you had? -Davy Dempsey-

Jennifer Crusie
North is a powerful man, and you're still connected to him." Flo frowned. "Probably sexual memory, those Capricorns are insatiable. Well, you know. Sea Goat. And of course, you're a Fish. You'll end up back in bed with him." Andie slammed the car door. "You know what I'd like for Christmas, Flo? Boundaries. You can gift me early if you'd like.

Jennifer Crusie
If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to be a horrible warning." -Gwen Goodnight

Jennifer Crusie
No more pep talks about believing in toads," Liza said. "Don't they turn into princeses when you kiss them?" Bonnie said. "Thats frogs," Liza Said. "Entirely different species.

Jennifer Crusie
That furniture cost me a fortune! It's designer furniture." "Designed by whom ? Darth Vader ? The Hitler Youth ?

Jennifer Crusie
That's not a father. That's a sperm donor. Forget him. He's a mess. Concentrate on me. I'm terrific. (Linc Blaise)

Jennifer Crusie
It's just that you don't respect me enough to respect what I want. I have to want what you want or it doesn't count or its's no good. Well, I don't want what you want. And I don't see why I have to. I mean, as long as I respect what you want and let you live your life, why do you care?

Jennifer Crusie
This is making me crazy. I hate relying on other people to save me, I hate being clingy, I hate it, and every time you show up, I lean on you. - Matilda Scarlet Veronica Betty Vilma Goodnight

Jennifer Crusie
I believe things will work out for us if we just believe in ourselves.

Jennifer Crusie
The last time I saw a brow that low I was watching slides in anthropology class

Jennifer Crusie
Where were all the women gamblers? It wasn't as if being a woman wasn't a huge risk all by itself. Twenty-eight percent of female homocide victims were killed by husbands or lovers. Which, come to think of it, was probably why there weren't any women gamblers. Living with men was enough of a gamble.

Jennifer Crusie
Tomorrow we go back to normal?" "Sure," Mab said. "It'll be like none of this happened. Except I'll still be pregnant, and you'll still be making dragons, and Glenda will still be pretending that Dreamland is Cancun, and Weaver will still own the only green velvet demon in captivity. Other than that, perfectly normal." "I just meant no demons trying to kill us," Cindy said. "My baseline for normal is a lot lower than yours.

Jennifer Crusie
Be sober, be vigilant because your adversary the Devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour.

Jennifer Crusie
Can we go to work now? Because we're about a minute away from breaking out the ice cream and talking about our feelings, and I don't think we can come back from that.

Jennifer Crusie
She slid out from under his arm, and picked up his shirt from the floor. When she put it on, it failed to meet in the middle over her chest. that always worked in the movies, she thought, disgusted, and dropped it on the floor.

Jennifer Crusie
Breasts are very important for women. Their clothes just don't hang right without them.

Jennifer Crusie
It was a lot easier when we could just brand'em," Ben said. "Then everybody'd know not to mess with our womenfolk.

Jennifer Crusie
You have to open up to the world and learn optimism...Contentment with the past, happiness with the present, and hope for the future. Learned optimisim.

Jennifer Crusie
Very few people mate for life with the people they fall for at twelve. Doesn't mean is isn't real, doesn't mean it doesn't hurt, doesn't mean it doesn't matter, but basically, we're talking a practice swing in the big game of love.

Jennifer Crusie
I'll never forget my first time with you' Min said as she edged the doughnut off her finger. 'The earth moved, and then my mother asked my father who he was going down on at lunch.

Jennifer Crusie