E. W. Howe Quotes

117 Sourced Quotes

If you go to church, and like the singing better than the preaching, that's not orthodox.

E. W. Howe
I declare my belief that it is not your duty to do anything that is not to your own interest. Whenever it is unquestionably your duty to do a thing, then it will benefit you to perform that duty.

E. W. Howe
If the fools do not control the world, it isn't because they are not in the majority.

E. W. Howe
The only gambling tip which amounts to anything is to keep out of the game.

E. W. Howe
A man has a right to think lots of things he has no right to say.

E. W. Howe
A man who will not get scared on some occasions, lacks good sense.

E. W. Howe
Don't take up a man's time talking about the smartness of your children; he wants to talk to you about the smartness of his children.

E. W. Howe
So long as we do not blow our brains out, we have decided life is worth living.

E. W. Howe
No really sensible person ever remembers enough poetry to recite it.

E. W. Howe
It is a matter of regret that many low, mean suspicions turn out to be well founded.

E. W. Howe
Where the guests at a gathering are well-acquainted, they eat 20 per cent more than they otherwise would.

E. W. Howe
If a man takes one day off, it takes him about three days to get the harness fitted again.

E. W. Howe
A successful man cannot realize how hard an unsuccessful man finds life.

E. W. Howe
If a man has money, it is usually a sign, too, that he knows how to take care of it; don't imagine his money is easy to get simply because he has plenty of it.

E. W. Howe
When a man asks your advice, he usually tells you just how he expects you to decide.

E. W. Howe
Put cream and sugar on a fly and it tastes very much like a raspberry.

E. W. Howe
When a man diets, he eats oatmeal in addition to everything else he usually eats.

E. W. Howe
About all some men accomplish in life is to send a son to Harvard.

E. W. Howe
Everyone hates a martyr; it's no wonder martyrs were burned at the stake.

E. W. Howe
A man forgets his good luck next day, but remembers his bad luck until next year.

E. W. Howe
Nothing pleases a woman quite so well as to look so sweet that a man wants to kiss her, and then abuse him for his impudence.

E. W. Howe
As soon as the people fix one Shame of the World, another turns up.

E. W. Howe
Somehow, everyone hates to see an unusually pretty girl get married. It is like taking a bite out of a very fine-looking peach.

E. W. Howe
What is common sense? That which attracts the least opposition: that which brings most agreeable and worthy results.

E. W. Howe
When a man dies, and his kin are glad of it, they say, "He is better off."

E. W. Howe
When a man tells you what people are saying about you, tell him what people are saying about him; that will immediately take his mind off your troubles.

E. W. Howe
If you want to know how old a woman is... ask her sister-in-law.

E. W. Howe