David Letterman - Years Quotes

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I was always surprised that they didn't let me go. Wait a minute — wouldn't you like me to go home now? Well, no. Next thing you know, I've been here 23 years.

David Letterman

We're told that they were zealots fueled by religious fervour…religious fervour and if you live to be a thousand years old will that make any sense to you? Will that make any goddamn sense?

David Letterman

A hundred years ago the Titanic sank. It was supposed to be unsinkable. If they were going to make that same cruise again today, thanks to global warming they would not have to worry about icebergs.

David Letterman

This year, there are 10 nominees for the Best Picture Oscar, in an effort to add some length to the show. This year the "dead actor" montage will also include those who are sick.

David Letterman

Every year when it's Chinese New Year here in New York, there are fireworks going off at all hours. New York mothers calm their frightened children by telling them it's just gunfire.

David Letterman

Asked by reporters about his upcoming marriage to a forty-two-year-old
woman, director Roman Polanski told reporters, The way I look at it,
she's the equivalent of three fourteen-year-olds.'

David Letterman