Dave Attell - Drunk Quotes

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She was drunk so I took her back to my place and we did it doggy style, not because we planned it that way, but that's just how she passed out.

Dave Attell

Eggnog - who thought that one up? "I wanna get a little drunk, but I also want some pancakes." You know what eggnog really is. You're not gonna want to hear it, but I'll tell ya. It's elf cum. You might as well pour it down your back and slap your self on the ass.

Dave Attell

Remember when you're young and you think your dad is Superman? And then you grow up and realized he's just a drunk who wears a cape.

Dave Attell