Chelsea Handler - Drink Quotes

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Our relationship finally ended when he took to waking me up in the wee hours o the morning when he would go surfing. He thought it might be fun to have me come watch. "Fun for who?" I wanted to ask. i had never asked him to come to Happy Hour and watch me drink.

Chelsea Handler

I went out with a guy who once told me I didn't need to drink to make myself more fun to be around. I told him, I'm drinking so that you're more fun to be around.

Chelsea Handler

Austin and I proceeded to knock back a couple of Ketel One and grapefruit juices, which happened to be my drink of the moment. Someone told me that grapefruit was a great detoxifier and I decided I wanted to start cleaning out my liver WHILE I was having a cocktail.

Chelsea Handler

You know you're a hot mess when the only person buying you drinks all night is yourself.

Chelsea Handler

There are two kinds of people I don't trust: people who don't drink and people who collect stickers.

Chelsea Handler