Abigail Van Buren Quotes

14 Sourced Quotes

If you want a place in the sun, you've got to put up with a few blisters.

Abigail Van Buren
A church is a hospital for sinners, not a museum for saints.

Abigail Van Buren
We've all known animal lovers who lavish an excessive amount of affection on pets, but who are cruel to people.

Abigail Van Buren
If you want your children to turn out well, spend twice as much time with them, and half as much money.

Abigail Van Buren
Psychotherapy, unlike castor oil, which will work no matter how you get it down, is useless when forced on an uncooperative patient.

Abigail Van Buren
Religion, like water, may be free, but when they pipe it to you, you've got to help pay for piping. And the Piper!

Abigail Van Buren
Wisdom does not automatically come with old age. Nothing does — except wrinkles. It's true, some wine improves with age. But only if the grapes were good in the first place.

Abigail Van Buren
The best index to a person's character is (a) how he treats people who can't do him any good, and (b) how he treats people who can't fight back.

Abigail Van Buren
While forbidden fruit is said to taste sweeter, it usually spoils faster.

Abigail Van Buren
Men who miscalculate are called "mathematically challenged." Women who miscalculate are called "mothers."

Abigail Van Buren
Maturity is the ability to do a job whether you're supervised or not; finish a job once it's started; carry money without spending it; and the ability to bear an injustice without wanting to get even.

Abigail Van Buren
Whether you want to speak to your wife is your own business, but for you to "let people know" that she violated her marriage vows will make you look like a cad. It is almost impossible to throw dirt on someone without getting a little on yourself.

Abigail Van Buren
Never give anyone an ultimatum unless you are prepared to lose.

Abigail Van Buren
If you think of him first, he will think of you first; that's a good marriage.

Abigail Van Buren