Woody Allen - Harry Quotes

11 Sourced Quotes

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Harry: All people know the same truth. Our lives consist of how we chose to distort it.

Woody Allen
Harry: You think the President of the United States wants to fuck every woman he meets?... Well, bad example.

Woody Allen
The Devil: You want me to turn the air-conditioning on?
Harry: You have air-conditioning in Hell?
The Devil: Sure, it fucks up the ozone layer!

Woody Allen
Burt: Do you care even about the Holocaust or do you think it never happened?
Harry: Not only do I know that we lost six million, but the scary thing is that records are made to be broken.

Woody Allen
Harry: Between the Pope and air conditioning, I'd choose air conditioning.

Woody Allen
Harry: Every hooker I ever speak to tells me that it beats the hell out of waitressing. Waitressing's gotta be the worst fucking job in the world.

Woody Allen
Harry: No, I don't think you're paranoid. I think you're the opposite of paranoid. I think you walk around with the insane delusion that people like you.

Woody Allen
Harry: (On being called a self-hating Jew) Hey, I may hate myself, but not because I'm Jewish.

Woody Allen
Cookie: What are you sad about?
Harry: I'm spiritually bankrupt. I'm empty.
Cookie: What do you mean?
Harry: I'm frightened. I got no soul, you know what I mean? Let me put it this way: when I was younger it was less scary waiting for Lefty than it is waiting for Godot.
Cookie: You lost me!
Harry: You know that the universe is coming apart? You know about that? You know what a black hole is?
Cookie: Yeah. That's how I make my living.

Woody Allen
Doris: You have no values. With you it's all nihilism, cynicism, sarcasm, and orgasm.
Harry: Hey, in France I could run for office with that slogan, and win!

Woody Allen
Harry: The most beautiful words in the English language aren't "I love you" but "it's benign."

Woody Allen