When we begin to act like adults, we threaten the equilibrium of our key relationships. The people we are closest to have a vested interest in keeping us locked into our old roles, our old ways. If we've been compliant and willing to fix their problems in the past, they want us to keep it up until the day we die. If we've taken control by telling people what to do and where to go so they don't have to think for themselves, they feel very uncomfortable when we insist that they take responsibility for their choices. And if we've been withdrawn, weak, and invisible, they're shocked when we begin to express our preferences.

p. 204-205 - Break Through: When to Give In, How to Push Back…The Moment That Changes Everything with Pat Springle (Worthy)