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Phyllis Diller - Bed Quotes

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I honestly believe there is absolutely nothing wrong about going to bed with a good book... or a friend who's read one.

Phyllis Diller
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When I go to bed at night, I've got so much grease on my body I wear snow chains to hold up my gown.

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Absolutely nothing was happening in my marriage, I nicknamed my water bed, Lake Placid!

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On her husband:
Fang is the cheapest man alive. On Christmas Eve, he puts the kids to bed, fires one shot, and tells them Santa has committed suicide.

Phyllis Diller

Quote of the day

Look in the mirror. The face that pins you with its double gaze reveals a chastening secret. You are looking into a predator's eyes. Most predators have eyes set right on the front of their heads, so they can use binocular vision to sight and track their prey.
Diane Ackerman

Phyllis Diller

Phyllis Diller
Creative Commons

Born: July 17, 1917
Died: August 20, 2012 (aged 95)
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