Lewis Carroll - Through the Looking-Glass (1871)

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Why, sometimes I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.

Lewis Carroll
The Walrus and the Carpenter
Were walking close at hand;
They wept like anything to see
Such quantities of sand.

Lewis Carroll
His answer trickled through my head,
Like water through a sieve.

Lewis Carroll
The other Messenger's called Hatta. I must have two you know—to come and go. One to come, and one to go.

Lewis Carroll
'The time has come,' the Walrus said,
'To talk of many things:
Of shoes—and ships—and sealing wax—
Of cabbages—and kings—
And why the sea is boiling hot—
And whether pigs have wings.'

Lewis Carroll
It isn't etiquette to cut anyone you've been introduced to. Remove the joint!

Lewis Carroll
Can you row?" the Sheep asked, handing her a pair of knitting-needles as she spoke. "Yes, a little—but not on land—and not with needles—" Alice was beginning to say.

Lewis Carroll
But answer came there none—
And this was scarcely odd because
They'd eaten every one.

Lewis Carroll
'There's nothing like eating hay when you're faint'…'I didn't say there was nothing better,' the King replied, 'I said there was nothing like it.'

Lewis Carroll
"I weep for you," the Walrus said:
"I deeply sympathize."
With sobs and tears he sorted out Those of the largest size,
Holding his pocket-handkerchief Before his streaming eyes.

Lewis Carroll
Or madly squeeze a right-hand foot
Into a left-hand shoe.

Lewis Carroll
And ever, as the story drained The wells of fancy dry, And faintly strove that weary one To put the subject by, "The rest next time—" "It is next time!" The Happy voice cry. Thus grew the tale of Wonderland

Lewis Carroll
In another moment Alice was through the glass, and had jumped lightly down into the Looking-glass room.

Lewis Carroll
And as in uffish thought he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came.
One, two! One, two! And through and through
The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!
He left it dead, and with its head
He went galumphing back.

Lewis Carroll
'There's glory for you!' 'I don't know what you mean by glory,' Alice said. 'I meant, there's a nice knock-down argument for you! ' 'But glory doesn't mean a nice knock-down argument,' Alice objected. 'When I use a word,' Humpty Dumpty said in a rather scornful tone, 'it means just what I choose it to mean—neither more nor less.'

Lewis Carroll
And if he left off dreaming about you, where do you suppose you'd be?

Lewis Carroll
'When I make a word do a lot of work like that,' said Humpty Dumpty, 'I always pay it extra.'

Lewis Carroll
Do you know, I always thought unicorns were fabulous monsters, too? I never saw one alive before!" Well, now that we have seen each other," said the unicorn, "if you'll believe in me, I'll believe in you.

Lewis Carroll
"The horror of that moment," the King went on, "I shall never, never forget!" "You will, though," the Queen said, "if you don't make a memorandum of it."

Lewis Carroll
Speak in French when you can't think of the English for a thing — turn out your toes when you walk — and remember who you are!

Lewis Carroll
'If seven maids with seven mops
Swept it for half a year,
Do you suppose,' the Walrus said,
'That they could get it clear?'
'I doubt it,' said the Carpenter,
And shed a bitter tear.

Lewis Carroll
But I was thinking of a plan
To dye one's whiskers green,
And always use so large a fan
That they could not be seen.
So having no reply to give
To what the old man said,
I cried, Come, tell me how you live!
And thumped him on the head.

Lewis Carroll
'I can repeat poetry as well as other folk if it comes to that—' 'Oh, it needn't come to that!' Alice hastily said.

Lewis Carroll
"It's very good jam," said the Queen. "Well, I don't want any to-day, at any rate." "You couldn't have it if you did want it," the Queen said. "The rule is jam tomorrow and jam yesterday but never jam to-day." "It must come sometimes to "jam to-day,""Alice objected. "No it can't," said the Queen. "It's jam every other day; to-day isn't any other day, you know." "I don't understand you," said Alice. "It's dreadfully confusing."

Lewis Carroll
What do you suppose is the use of a child without any meaning? Even a joke should have some meaning— and a child's more imporant than a joke, I hope. You couldn't deny that, even if you tried with both hands.

Lewis Carroll