Jean Kerr Quotes

54 Sourced Quotes

It has been explained to me that toys are packaged in shards, to be assembled by the middle-aged and butter-fingered, because this makes it easier for the shippers.... If they had to spend hours and hours putting handlebars onto bicycles... they would repent their ways and deliver something that looked like a rocking horse and not like the result of a small street accident.

Jean Kerr
Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn't always go with everything else in the house.

Jean Kerr
I know all about improvisation and the free-form that mirrors the chaos of our time, but I do like to feel that the playwright has done some work before I got there.

Jean Kerr
You want to analyze, analyze. Like those people who take an overdose of sleeping pills, and sit there making notes while they're dying. 'Four a.m. Vision beginning to blur.' You'd do that. You would.

Jean Kerr
It was hard to communicate with you. You were always communicating with yourself. The line was busy.

Jean Kerr
Life with Mary was like being in a telephone booth with an open umbrella — no matter which way you turned, you got it in the eye.

Jean Kerr
Dearer to me than the evening star
A Packard car
A Hershey bar
Or a bride in her rich adorning
Dearer than any of these by far
Is to lie in bed in the morning.

Jean Kerr
Do you know how helpless you feel if you have a full cup of coffee in your hand and you start to sneeze?

Jean Kerr
There's a flaw in your character, Oliver. You have a problem for every solution.

Jean Kerr
To me having a party is something like having a baby. The fact that you got through the last one alive is not somehow sufficiently reassuring now.

Jean Kerr
While in some quarters it is felt that the critic is just a necessary evil, most serious-minded, decent, talented theater people agree that the critic is an unnecessary evil.

Jean Kerr
Apparently she was so charming it was practically a disease. Even the hygienist who cleaned her big, white teeth fell in love with her. She could get plumbers to come on Sunday.

Jean Kerr
There is this to be said about having money. You get rejected by a higher class of people.

Jean Kerr
Children are different—mentally, physically, spiritually, quantitatively, qualitatively; and furthermore, they're all a little bit nuts.

Jean Kerr
Women speak because they wish to speak, whereas a man speaks only when driven to speech by something outside himself—like, for instance, he can't find any clean socks.

Jean Kerr
'I thought we talked things out!' 'Yes, and you listened very carefully to every word you had to say.'

Jean Kerr
Years ago when a man began to notice that if he stood up on the subway he was immediately replaced by two people, he figured he was getting too fat.

Jean Kerr
It's impossible to register any emotion without using some muscle which, in time, will produce a wrinkle.... By the time she is thirty, a starlet has been carefully taught to smile like a dead halibut. The eyes widen, the mouth drops open, but the eye muscles are never involved.

Jean Kerr
I think success has no rules, but you can learn a great deal from failure.

Jean Kerr
Being on a ship is something like being pregnant. You can sit there and do absolutely nothing but stare at the water and have the nicest sense that you are accomplishing something.

Jean Kerr
Oh, wouldn't it be wonderful if some manufacturer would make a toy as tough, as staunch, as hard to crack open as the carton it comes in!

Jean Kerr
Some people have such a talent for making the best of a bad situation that they go around creating bad situations so they can make the best of them.

Jean Kerr
People only call you 'my dear' when they are irritated with you.

Jean Kerr
'Helen, I wish you'd lay off that fudge, you're going to be fat and waddle just like your mother.'... 'Honey, why don't we both go on a diet and buy some new clothes?' There is a right way to put things and a wrong way.

Jean Kerr