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Janet Evanovich -
Grandma
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At the other end of the room, Grandma had the lid up on Larry Lipinski. She was standing one foot on a folding chair, one foot on the edge of the casket, and she was taking pictures with a disposable camera.
Janet Evanovich
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You gonna take the case?" It's not a case. It's a missing person. Sort of." You're gonna have a devil of a time finding him if it was aliens," Grandma said.
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I always wanted to eat with a Negro, Grandma said. Yeah, well I always wanted to eat with a boney- assed old white woman, Lula said. So I guess this works out good.
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I was watching television and I saw how you stick your fingers in a person's eyes to slow them down." Grandma Mazur
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I met a real looker. He picked me up at the two dollar slot machines, so you know he's no cheapskate." Grandma Mazur
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The dog ran into the kitchen, stuck his nose in Grandma's crotch, and snuffled. Dang," Grandma said. "Guess my new perfume really works. I'm gonna have to try it out at the seniors meeting.
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Almost everybody I know has died, Grandma said. Bunch of wimps.
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Aren't you something," Grandma said. "I never saw a midget up close." "Little person," Briggs said. "And I never saw anyone as old as you up close, either.
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Maybe it was me," Grandma said."Sometimes they sneak out.Did I fart?
Janet Evanovich
Quote of the day
Life is just what happens to you, while you're busy making other plans.
John Lennon
Janet Evanovich
Creative Commons
Born:
April 22, 1943
(age 81)
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