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Humor inspires sympathetic, good-natured laughter and is favored by the healing power gang. Wit goes for the jugular, not the jocular, and it's the opposite of football; instead of building character, it tears it down.
Florence King
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The joker in the deck of lesbian fidelity is female vanity: no woman of fifty is going to undress in front of a woman of twenty no matter how much she might lust for her.
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There is much to be said for post-menopausal celibacy. Sex is rough on loners because you have to have somebody else around, but now I don't. No more diets to stay slim and desirable: I've had sex and I've had food, and I'd rather eat.
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Now the only thing I miss about sex is the cigarette afterward. Next to the first one in the morning, it's the best one of all. It tasted so good that even if I had been frigid I would have pretended otherwise just to be able to smoke it.
Florence King
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In Mississippi the important thing is hooch, not bar equipment.
Florence King
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America is not a democracy, it's an absolute monarchy ruled by King Kid. In a nation of immigrants, the child is automatically more of an American than his parents. Americans regard children as what Mr. Hudson in Upstairs, Downstairs called betters. Aping their betters, American adults do their best to turn themselves into children. Puerility exercises droit de seigneur everywhere.
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Writers who have nothing to say always strain for metaphors to say it in.
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Families composed of rugged individualists have to do things obliquely.
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In order to molest a child you must first be in the same room with a child, and I don't know how perverts stand it.
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A home without a grandmother is like an egg without salt.
Florence King
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To a Southerner it is faux pas, not sins, that matter in this world.
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In the last few years, race relations in America have entered upon a period of intensified craziness wherein fear of being called a racist has so thoroughly overwhelmed fear of being a racist that we are in danger of losing sight of the distinction.
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During the feminist seventies men were caught between a rock and a hard-on; in the fathering eighties they are caught between good hugs and bad hugs.
Florence King
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We exchanged wary stares: two people in search of a wavelength.
Florence King
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Southerners have a genius for psychological alchemy.... If something intolerable simply cannot be changed, driven away, or shot, they will not only tolerate it but take pride in it as well.
Florence King
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The witty woman is a tragic figure in American life. Wit destroys eroticism and eroticism destroys wit, so women must choose between taking lovers and taking no prisoners.
Florence King
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Because the theater lost a Barrymore every time a Southerner decided not to go on the stage, just about anything that comes out of a Southern mouth is bound to be a ringing line.
Florence King
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I like to use as few commas as possible so that sentences will go down in one swallow without touching the sides.
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Gradually my whole concept of time changed until I thought of a month as having twenty-five days of humanness and five others when I might just as well have been an animal in a steel trap.
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Quote of the day
Life is not having been told that the man has just waxed the floor.
Ogden Nash
Florence King
Born:
January 5, 1936
Died:
January 6, 2016
(aged 80)
Bio:
Florence Virginia King was an American novelist, essayist and columnist.
Known for:
Confessions of a failed Southern lady (1985)
Southern ladies and gentlemen (1975)
With Charity Toward None (1992)
The Florence King reader (1995)
Reflections in a jaundiced eye (1989)
Most used words:
people
american
woman
sex
throw
child
human
america
matter
twenty
thought
democracy
occasional
start
time
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