Once we make our relationship choices in an adult way, a prospective partner who is unavailable, nonreciprocal, or not open to processing feelings and issues, becomes, by those very facts, unappealing. Once we love ourselves, people no longer look good to us unless they are good for us.

How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving (ed. Shambhala Publications, 2002) - ISBN: 9780834821033