Darynda Jones - Guy Quotes

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I've been thinking," Brooklyn said as I gawked at the god sitting next to me, "if you get all lovey-dovey and decide to elope to Las Vegas where Jared uses his powers to clean up at the poker tables and you guys buy a mansion in the Manzano Mountains with twenty-seven rooms and decide - because you're rich and all - to buy a new computer, can I have your iMac then?" "Um, no, you're not getting my iMac." "Dang.

Darynda Jones
If Cameron kidnaps you, kills you, then buries your lifeless body in a shallow grave in the desert where your remains lay decomposing for several decades until they're accidentally discovered by some guy on a journey to awaken his spirit at the Salinas Pueblo Missions, can I have your iMac?" I gaped at her. "You've really thought this out. "I love your iMac." "I love my iMac too, and you're not getting her." "But you'll be decomposing.

Darynda Jones
We stood there, the three of us, our jaws firmly planted on the floor. Aunt Lil recovered first. She nudged me with her elbow and said with a cackle of delight, "I think you guys should make some more of those brownies, 'cause that boy looks hungry.

Darynda Jones
Where have you been?" I stepped into my apartment and met Uncle Bob's glare with one of my own. "Out trying to pass myself off as a movie producer to get hot guys to sleep with me. Where have you been?

Darynda Jones
She still wasn't convinced. "So, if you were a guy, would you be into me?" "Hon, if I were a guy, I'd be gay." "Yeah, me, too.

Darynda Jones
Surely my macking on some guy in an insane asylum wouldn't hurt him. He'd been living with his stalker, for heaven's sake.

Darynda Jones
You rented the apartment with a dead guy in the corner? I shrugged. I wanted the apartment, and I figured I could cover him up with a bookcase or something.

Darynda Jones
I have three words for you," EMT Guy said. "Possible internal bleeding." I turned back to him. "Don't you think if I was bleeding internally, I'd know somewhere deep inside? Like, internally?

Darynda Jones
For the first time in my life, I was in a shoot-out. A real, honest-to-goodness shoot-out with a bad guy. And, apparently, we both sucked.

Darynda Jones
A guy in an SUV tried to kill me. That's strange. Why? Because the guy I hired doesn't drive an SUV. That is strange.

Darynda Jones
Guys have feelings too. But like...who cares? -Inspirational poster

Darynda Jones
This guy in high school tried to run me over with his dad's SUV. Bad shoved the vehicle through a store window. The memory brought a smile to my face.

Darynda Jones
I sort of got off on making bad guys sweat. Which was not unlike my love of making good guys sweat, just by very different means.

Darynda Jones
Hey, I'm going to Super Dog for a quick bite and to pass along a message from a dead guy to his girlfriend. You should come with me." "I can't go with you." "Is it because of my questionable morals?" "No, it's because it's three o'clock in the afternoon and I have to pick up Amber from school." "Oh, right. So the morals thing doesn't bother you?

Darynda Jones
You take everything onto your shoulders like that guy who holds up the world, and you shouldn't. You're not nearly as muscular.

Darynda Jones