At the most basic level, therefore, secure attachments in both childhood and adulthood are established by two individual's sharing a nonverbal focus on the energy flow (emotional states) and a verbal focus on the information-processing aspects (representational processes of memory and narrative) of mental life. The matter of the mind matters for secure attachments.
The Developing Mind: How Relationships and the Brain Interact to Shape Who We Are (ed. Guilford Press, 1999) - ISBN: 9781606235799