Daniel Handler - The Wide Window (2000)

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Oftentimes, when people are miserable, they will want to make other people miserable, too. But it never helps. -Lemony Snicket

Daniel Handler

For Beatrice—I would much prefer it if you were alive and well.

Daniel Handler

If you are allergic to a thing, it is best not to put that thing in your mouth, particularly if the thing is cats. -Lemony Snicket

Daniel Handler

There are few sights sadder than a ruined book. -Lemony Snicket

Daniel Handler

Stealing, of course, is a crime, and a very impolite thing to do. But like most impolite things, it is excusable under certain circumstances. Stealing is not excusable if, for instance, you are in a museum and you decide that a certain painting would look better in your house, and you simply grab the painting and take it there. But if you were very, very hungry, and you had no way of obtaining money, it might be excusable to grab the painting, take it to your house, and eat it. -Lemony Snicket

Daniel Handler