Seeing your mother naked is not something you easily recover from. Seeing your mother naked and jumping from one side of a king-sized bed to the other with a nurse's hat on while your father, who is also naked, is chasing her with a bandanna around his neck, is reason to put yourself up for adoption.

My Horizontal Life: A Collection of One Night Stands (ed. Grand Central Publishing, 2013) - ISBN: 9781455577521